Why Am I Anonymous?

Recently, I’ve really been questioning why I don’t really publicise or give the link to this blog to people I know personally.

First thing to get out the way – I’m not a different person on here. If I gave this blog to my best friends, they would find most of it repetition, I mean, I talk about most of this stuff with them anyway.

What I’m more self concious about is people reading older posts. My opinions have changed, I no longer believe some of the things I wrote but that doesn’t mean I want to delete those posts because at the time I held that to be true, so for me, it’s a nice record to keep in terms of the development of my personality. And I think that’s why I absolutely hate giving out any of my social media like twitter and this blog to people I have just met. It means they can make judgements on who I was a year ago rather than who I am now.

Another major point of self conciousness, is my writing. I know I’m not at good writing, and to be honest I don’t think that’s going to change any time soon. I feel (maybe wrongly) that people will judge my intelligence on this? With people who I know this can then translate into real life conversations being different.

Another thing about me is that I’m quite a private person. I don’t like people who I don’t call my friends, knowing things about me (vague, I know). Yet in this blog, I am extremely open. I think again, it leads to the fact that when meeting new people I want to have conversations with them where we both know the same amount about each other and go on a journey to discover more. That can’t happen if they already know my opinion on half the topics under the sun.

I’m sorry, this wasn’t a very fun post, but I wanted to get my thoughts into some sort of order and written down. I’m not always proud of this blog but thanks for sticking around.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

 

How do you make people feel?

It’s the way that people make you feel that you remember; not exactly what they said.

I’ve tried to pinpoint what exactly the person is doing or saying when they make me feel valued or just good, but it’s so difficult. I think it’s a combination of body language, eye contact, content of the words they say and just the general vibes that they give.

I try to constantly judge and recognise how make people feel. It’s a difficult one, because people so often hide their true feelings, but putting yourself in their shoes and taking time out to think about how you would react in their situation, is time well spent. Making a few changes like showing genuine interest in what they’re talking about and giving them your full attention can make such a difference. I’m lucky to say that I have so many people around me who make me and others feel special; now it’s just for me to learn from them!

I would love to know what you think about the things I’ve said!

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

 

Revolving Doors – An Analogy

It can’t be just me who think automatic revolving doors (the sort in the entrance to shopping centres) are the most stupid things to be created. It’s kind of a metaphor for a shit life really; doing the same thing again and again, going round in circles at a painfully slow rate and never really getting anywhere. Normal automatic or push doors on the other hand provide an analogy for dictating the pace of your own life and getting straight to the point and most importantly moving forward.

This very weird rant comes from my local shopping centre spending money  removing the perfectly fine automatic door for one of these stupid things and I’m irritated about the amount of time I have already wasted in it. On another note, manual revolving doors are so much fun. You can just run in a circle and feel like a hamster for a while.

This post was real fricking weird so follow me for more ‘normal’ content in the future.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

Achievement

Different people value their achievements at different levels. For example, an A grade may be brilliant to one person but not enough for another. The thing that I’m most conscious about when talking to others, is recognising what they think about their achievement.

It doesn’t matter whether or not you would be proud of that achievement, if they are proud, you should share their enthusiasm. But alas, I am not perfect and sometimes my ego does rule my brain and I have an urge (which is usually controlled) to say, ‘But I did that same thing and didn’t say anything about it, why are you making such a big fuss?’ After thinking about it rationally, I am always happy for the person who has achieved something which they are proud of. In the end, I think we should all support each other. After all, you don’t need to put someone down to be better yourself.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

Opinions Change

An opinion you had yesterday may be contradictory to the opinion you have now; that’s completely okay. In fact, I think it’s admirable to admit that something or someone has changed your view on a subject. It shows you are an open-minded person enough to listen to others and decide for yourself what you agree with and what you don’t.

What really frustrates me is those who refuse to listen to others and refuse to create an open discussion. Open discussions lead to progress within yourself, and also within society. So next time someone challenges your view, before getting defensive, listen, and you might find yourself agreeing.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

Why do I want followers?

I’ve never been one of those #likeforlikes or #followforfollow people but why do I become slightly happier when that little notification button tells me I have a new follower? I’ve always maintained that I write this blog for myself. For my enjoyment and for my future self to read back on in the near and far future. But I think underneath this is the ultimate human desire to be understood and validated. When someone follows me it means they want to read more of my opinions and more about me. It also means that I can potentially have an impact on more people (however tiny), and in a way, that’s power. So does that mean the more followers I have the more power I have and that’s why I like it? If this is the case, things are bad and I definitely need to change my motivation for this blog.  On the other hand maybe I’m just overthinking this and I just like interacting with new people. Who knows?

Let me know your opinion on the matter!

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

Random Things I Learnt This Week

Bloggers and readers alike seem to love lists. As do I! So here’s a list of the things I learned after a not so brilliant week:

  • Cryptic crosswords aren’t impossible! – I don’t know about you but until recently I used to dismiss the cryptic crossword as impossible and a thing for middle-aged parents to do at the breakfast table; while I stuck to the logical, doable sudokus. Turns out, as long as you do a bit of research on the technique, they are within reach and actually, somewhat surprisingly, quite fun.
  • Waiting time is not wasted time – When waiting for the next bus after missing the other by 30 seconds (an annoyingly regular occurrence being me) the time in between when you are in limbo can and should be enjoyed. In the mornings, I have been looking and appreciating the glorious winter sky. And in the evenings, I ponder the events of the day taking note of what could be improved for the next. Stressing about not doing anything isn’t going to help so enjoying the time in whatever way is best for you is the way to go.
  • It’s hard to be interesting – Although the case in real life, I mainly mean on social media. How is it possible to tweet more than one witty and funny tweet a day? In fact if anyone has any tips on how to be witty at all they would be much appreciated.

Do you have any slightly random things you’ve learnt this week?

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

Are you doing what you expected to be?

It’s weird to think how our past selves of years or even weeks ago would never expect our present selves to do some of the things we are doing. I’ve been thinking about a few examples in my own life:

  • I have a blog where I write posts?! Writing has never ever been my strong point so if you had told 14-year old me that I actually enjoyed writing (kind of) regularly on my blog, I would have laughed whole-heartedly at the mere suggestion.
  • I am willingly taking 3 extra maths modules for fun. Exactly a year ago I remember my exact words being, ‘I hate maths, I’m definitely going to drop it this year.’ And here I am carrying on with maths and taking it to a further level. How did this happen? :’)
  • I now volunteer at a disabled youth group; and went on holiday with them. A few weeks in to volunteering at the youth group, I went along to the Isle of Wight with them barely knowing any of the staff or young people there. (Look out for a future post talking more about this trip!). Even just two years ago, I would never have had the confidence to go off by myself like this.

I think what I’m trying to say in my usual roundabout way is that unless you try things that you think you’ll hate you might never find something that you love. And it’s not worth taking that risk.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

 

Asking For It by Louise O’Neill | Book Review

For those who have not read this book an extremely simplified version of the plot is that an 18 year old girl named Emma is gang raped by a group of ‘well-respected’ boys in her town. The book highlights how society responds in this situation as well as the feelings Emma herself has towards the ordeal.
I have to admit, not all aspects of this book made me think 5* book. But one aspect that certainly did was the way in which the issue of rape culture was tackled. This was done so perfectly – it was incredibly hard-hitting at exactly the right places.
At the beginning, I often felt as though many modern culture references were trying to be thrown in, just for the sake of it. As the book went on, this aspect died down and when modern references were made, it seemed to be more relevant.
The repetitive words in italics towards the end simply did not have the intended effect on me, they were just inconveniences which I would skip over in order to get to the interesting parts. This leads on to the point that there were some parts of the book I couldn’t put down but others where it was incredibly repetitive and I would’ve preferred some character development of some of the other main characters.
I understand the author’s desire to be realistic with the ending which is why I’m struggling to form an opinion as to whether or not I liked it. There were just too many loose ends and it felt as though Emma’s story wasn’t complete. But maybe the story is for the reader to complete?
Overall, this book deals with extremely important issues and is a very quick and gripping read. The issues aren’t specific to one gender and neither is this book.

Thanks for reading this far. Book reviews aren’t my strong point so constructive criticism would be great!

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen

10 Resolutions for 2016

  1. The 50 book challenge. (I didn’t say I was going to be original with these!)
  2. Become a social media expert. By this I mean sort out my mess of accounts at the moment and post regular and interesting things about my life.
  3. Publish at least one blog post a week. I think in the past when promising a schedule I have not been ready to actually do it but I’m hoping 2016 is the year to make it happen.
  4. Write more book reviews. These definitely aren’t my strength but I love reading my thoughts on a book a few months or even years later so get ready to see a few more of them.
  5. Do a month of blogging. I did this in November this year and enjoyed it way more than I was expecting.
  6. Become vegan. This is one that is going to be a slow process but by the end of the year I hope to have a fully vegan diet.
  7. Learn photography. My instagram needs better pictures.
  8. Work harder.
  9. Document my life more. I want to not only write in my diary more regularly but maybe make a few videos too.
  10. Make every interaction count. This is something I’ve been conscious of for a while. However short the interaction, I want it to be meaningful and/or fun.

So there’s that. My first public new years resolution list. I am constantly making new resolutions throughout the rest of the year but a new year is motivation to really go do those things you’ve been meaning to do. (Sometimes it even works!).

I would love you guys to leave comments with your resolutions or any comments on mine.

Until next time lovely people,

slothyqueen